Entry 423: If I say, I finally realised what's missing is not love..

Love, isn't all that keep me going..

But it seems like I've finally noticed the change.

That no one could feel the way I do

When life becomes blissful yet monotonous.

I am indeed happy and contented for all that I have in love

No matter how sadness and disappointment would hit

I still feel glad to have you beside me.

As days passed, it got clearer than ever.

Where are you... my dear friends??

Did I choose to leave you behind?

Have I forgotten you?

Or has life taken its toll on us?

I was browsing through blogs of people I know, and those I don't..

All that kept me staying in that page for a minute longer,

are those beautiful moments they captured with their friends.

And I wonder..

Friend? Am I missing you?

True friendship never ends just like this.

They brave through stormy seas, they mount to the highest peak

Yet I don't know..

How long could I survive..

This path I believe in is getting tougher than ever.

The loneliness is creeping.

I felt like in this world, I'm deceiving no one else but myself.

I tried consoling and persuading myself that friendship should be from the heart

It should stay and remain there

But I realised..

It's not just mentally, I need it physical.

I've been staying home for days and weeks and almost a month.

I kept myself to no one else but the laptop and dramas.

I rang up my friends..

Some offers I declined..

What's up with me?

I want them near, yet when they come, I pushed them away.

I need you people in my life..

Spices of life..

Is that door closing? I can no longer see the lights to all of you....